- School: no shoulder-revealing shirts
- Student: why?
- School: you might ferociously anal fist each other in the hallway
today at the bookstore i asked the lady working if she had any lgbtq books that i could check out and her eyes magnified in what i mistook as horror and i thought i had offended her and then she said “i have a bag of lesbian fiction in the basement i’ve been waiting for someone to finally ask” and she all but burst down the stairs to get them for me
"I have a bag of lesbian fiction in the basement" is my new go-to pickup line
- me at school: omg when i get home i've got to do loads of shit like finish that project and read that book omg i need to review for that test too omg so much to do
- me at home: